Billy Madison Quotes "I want to see your face at least twice!"

"Billy Madison" is a comedy film released in 1995, starring Adam Sandler in the titular role. The film was directed by Tamra Davis and written by Adam Sandler and Tim Herlihy. It's known for its over-the-top humor and absurd comedic situations.

The story revolves around Billy Madison, a young man who comes from a wealthy family and lives a carefree life of partying and immaturity. However, his father informs him that in order to inherit the family's hotel empire, he must complete all 12 grades of school in just 24 weeks. This leads to Billy hilariously attempting to complete each grade, from kindergarten to 12th grade, by taking on various comedic challenges and learning experiences.

The movie is known for its quirky and often raunchy humor, as well as its memorable quotes and moments. It's considered a cult classic among fans of Adam Sandler's early comedies. Some of the famous quotes from "Billy Madison" include:

1. "Back to school. Back to school, to prove to Dad that I'm not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight. Ohhhh, back to school. Back to school. Back to school. Well, here goes nothing."

2. "If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis."

3. "I'll bet you're all the ladies' man in high school."

"Shut up!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. That was rude and uncalled for. I'm sorry. And you are?"

"Veronica Vaughn."

"Oh, Veronica Vaughn. Oh, oh, oh."

4. "It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around here. I gotta send you back to the South Pole."

5. "I can't wait to go to school and take some kids' lunch money."

6. "No, I will not make out with you. Did ya hear that? This girl wants to make out with me in the middle of class. You got Chlorophyll Man up there talking about God knows what and all she can talk about is making out with me. I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you. Go on with the chlorophyll."

7. "Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

8. "T-t-today, Junior!"

9. "Well, I made the duck blue because I'd never seen a blue duck before, and I wanted to see one."

10. "So you're new?"

"Yeah. Just moved here with my dad. He buys and sells stocks."

"Oh, so you're rich."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Then maybe you could buy yourself a friend."

"Billy Madison" is a film known for its goofy humor and quotable lines that have made it a favorite among fans of '90s comedies.

Billy Madison Quotes

Here are 50 more quotes from the movie "Billy Madison":

1. "Hey, kids. It's me. I bet you thought that I was dead. But when I fell over I just broke my leg and got a hemorrhage in my head."

2. "I drew the duck blue because I've never seen a blue duck before, and to be honest with you, I wanted to see a blue duck."

3. "That's the cutest, funniest thing I've ever seen."

4. "Principal: Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

5. "I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you."

6. "You blew it!"

7. "If you can't do it, no one can."

8. "He's got a poo-poo head."

9. "Principal: Mr. Madison, what you've just said is the most insanely idiotic things I've ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

10. "Billy, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

11. "Don't worry, you're not the only guy that's ever taken a dump in the pool."

12. "Who can remember anything that happened after third grade?"

13. "Miss Vaughn, I'm sorry I called you a gap-toothed bitch. It's not your fault your gap-toothed. That's hereditary. Are your parents/gaps too?"

14. "It's way more fun than my imaginary puppy."

15. "I'm gonna take a nap."

16. "You're giving a book to a guy who a month ago didn't even know what a book was."

17. "Stop looking at me, swan!"

18. "That Veronica Vaughn is one piece of ace. I know from experience, dude."

19. "Gatorade not only quenches your thirst better, it tastes better too."

20. "I can read!"

21. "Chlorophyll? More like 'borophyll'!"

22. "I want to see your face at least twice!"

23. "The puppy who lost his way."

24. "Son of a bitch! He's onto something."

25. "Mr. Madison, what you just said is the most insanely idiotic thing I've ever heard. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

26. "Whoever threw that paper, your mom's a hoe."

27. "It's too hot for a penguin to just be walkin' around here."

28. "You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up."

29. "I'd like to dedicate this song to a young lady named Veronica Vaughn."

30. "You get out of here! You ain't cool! You ain't nothin'!"

31. "Let the high-flying spectacle begin!"

32. "Shampoo is better. I go on first and clean the hair!"

33. "He's lying! He's lying!"

34. "Today, junior!"

35. "You're the smartest guy I know, and you're too stupid to see he made up his mind 10 minutes ago."

36. "He called the shit 'poop.'"

37. "Oh, Veronica Vaughn, sooo hot, want to touch the hiney."

38. "Billy likes to drink soda."

39. "I'm really smart now."

40. "You blew it."

41. "Don't you say that. Don't you ever say that. Stay here. Stay as long as you can. For the love of God, cherish it."

42. "That's not great, Billy."

43. "The Industrial Revolution to me is just like a story I know called 'The Puppy Who Lost His Way.'"

44. "T-t-today, Junior!"

45. "You're a cool guy, Drew."

46. "Miss Lippy's car is green."

47. "I'm a smart guy."

48. "Billy, I'm gonna ask you a question, and I want you to be honest with me. Do you want to stay at school?"

49. "Billy is a very special boy."

50. "The penguin is the most majestic of all birds."

Billy Madison Quotes

Here are quotes from "Billy Madison" that fall under the categories you've mentioned

**Billy Madison Quotes about Being Dumber:**

1. "Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

2. "Billy, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

3. "That's the cutest, funniest thing I've ever seen."

4. "That's not great, Billy."

5. "You're the smartest guy I know, and you're too stupid to see he made up his mind 10 minutes ago."

**Billy Madison Quotes about Veronica:**

1. "That Veronica Vaughn is one piece of ace. I know from experience, dude. You know what I mean?"

2. "Hey, Veronica Vaughn. Sssssoooo hot. Want to touch the hiney."

3. "I'd like to dedicate this song to a young lady named Veronica Vaughn."

4. "Don't worry, you're not the only guy that's ever taken a dump in the pool."

**Billy Madison Quotes about School:**

1. "Back to school. Back to school, to prove to Dad that I'm not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight. Ohhhh, back to school. Back to school. Back to school. Well, here goes nothing."

2. "Today, junior!"

3. "Who can remember anything that happened after third grade?"

4. "I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you."

5. "You get out of here! You ain't cool! You ain't nothin'!"

**Billy Madison Quotes about the Penguin:**

1. "It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around here. I gotta send you back to the South Pole."

2. "The penguin is the most majestic of all birds."

3. "The Industrial Revolution to me is just like a story I know called 'The Puppy Who Lost His Way.'"

**Billy Madison Quotes about Being Idiotic:**

1. "Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

**Billy Madison Quotes about Peeking Your Pants:**

1. "If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis."

**Billy Madison Quotes about the Stuffed Buffalo:**

1. "Oh, it's okay. I wouldn't have passed that class if it wasn't for my lucky [stuffed] buffalo."

**Billy Madison Quotes about Cheating on His Wife:**

1. "What you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."